THE POWER OF LABELS.

Sometimes, the act or significance of something is made graver by being labelled.
 
Label: a classifying phrase or name applied to a person or thing, especially one that is inaccurate or restrictive. (According to google.)

The power of labels is not to be undermined. A married woman who seeks a child may not be so bothered by the fact that she has no offspring borne of her as she would be when she remembers she would be called 'barren' or 'childless'. So while praying she asks God to save her from the shame of being called barren. She is more concerned by the label her 'condition' has brought upon her, than the condition itself. Let me give another example- a woman who has lost her husband is labelled a widow. This connotation evokes pity, it reminds the bearer that she's unfortunate. Don't get me wrong. It's a great misfortune to lose one's husband, and it's unfortunate enough. Giving the 'condition' a label makes it more unfortunate. It even becomes worse when you have to always identify yourself by such label, like joining the widows group of your church, or of your community, attending Second Wednesday of the month prayer meetings as it is when your church organizes prayers for barren women. I find labels so depressing. Let's imagine a woman who had no child in her marriage also loses her husband. A barren widow, you know that's what she'll be called. Let's add another misery to this hypothetical woman. Let's say she has lost both parents. An orphaned barren widow. Do you understand the gravity of such label? It's enough reason for one to feel utterly neglected by her creator.
This is not me trying to avoid calling a spade, spade. It's trying to sometimes, be euphemistic most especially in unhappy situations.
Labels are restrictive, most especially when they're not socially 'cool'. There are times I didn't quote the scriptures because I didn't want to be labelled 'churchy'. Times I didn't speak against what's wrong or advice my friends against doing something wrong because I didn't want to sell myself as 'holy'. When I did, I expressed my fear of being labelled by adding, 'I'm not trying to say I'm perfect o'.
The people that Labels affect most are children because they are most vulnerable and yet to form a concrete opinion about themselves.
Labels evoke certain actions. 'Widow' evokes pity. 'Homosexuality' evokes beating. 'Paedophile' and sometimes 'gerentophile' evokes tufiakwa. 'Rich' evokes acceptance and inspiration etc.
There's however a hypocritical part to labelling. It will be discussed under the theme, 'synonym'. Naturally, however, people do not like to be labelled. Racists for example. You could hear someone say: I'm not racist, it's just that I don't like black people. Could you shut up already! Sometimes however, there are certain things that affords one the luxury of not being labelled. Money, for example. Relationship, synonym, sex and gender etc.

Money: people make excuses for rich people, they seldom do for people who are not financially buoyant. A rich married couple may have no child, but they aren't quickly labelled barren. You'd hear people say: you know how these rich people behave, they may not want children. If they did they would have opted for IVF if they cannot conceive naturally. Whatever you decide to become in life, please decide to be rich.

Relationship: some girls are in relationships for money, some boys- for sex. When this exchange is done outside a relationship, it's labelled prostitution.

Synonym: hopefully we know the meaning of this word. Some synonyms carry less gravity than the other. I'll give you an example. Money given to someone to grant unmerited favour is not a 'token' or 'incentive' or 'motivator', it's a bribe. Someone who scams people of their money via internet is called a Yahoo or G-boy. If we were to go by it's synonym, the person would be called a thief. And that's what the person is. Fullstop. 'G-boy' sounds cool, 'thief' doesn't.

Gender and sex: there are so many things ones gender and sex affords the person. These words don't really mean the same thing. The former is socially determined, while the latter is biologically determined. A man is seldom called barren. In fact, I've never heard a man called barren, but a woman is because her gender is charged with the duty of procreation, without taking full cognizance of the man's role in this duty. 'Widower', is not as frequently used as 'widow', because a man is not meant to be pitied and reminded of his misfortune. He should get a grip of himself osiso, quickly.
"So should we stop using certain words?" You may ask. Yes. If we can. Yes. As I missed getting a first class by 0.06 points, it's bad enough. I feel worse when people say, 'eiya, she's the one that nearly got first class'. Like seriously, thanks for the reminder. I know who I am.
What I'm saying summarily is this: we should use labels only when necessary. We should call someone a thief if the person is. It's necessary, for that's a conscious decision of the person. We shouldn't however, remind someone who lost her husband of her loss by calling her a widow. She doesn't need the reminder. Her misfortune is not of her doing. If you still do not understand the Power of labels, look at our Super Eagles team. They have consistently been labelled useless.
We should however, keep in mind that labels aren't always negative. They could sometimes be positive. If you could afford it, you may perhaps choose Nike over an unknown designer.
I'd like to read from you too. How do you think labelling affects people? Have you ever been labelled something you don't like?